Thursday, November 12, 2009

SOBCON08 Christine Kane with fansImage by ShashiBellamkonda via Flickr

I'm busy prepping for www.iblogconference.com and today we have a guest blogger. I love Christine Kane and here's some great advice!

Let's face it. No matter how much progress we make, we're still going to have "bad days."

You know the ones. When the old critical voices are milling about drinking martinis and eating crab puffs in your head. You try to send them all away with your favorite powerful affirmation, but only a few of them even look up - and one of them turns away and lights a cigarette.

What do you do when no matter what you do, you just feel awful?

Very few success-gurus talk about the bad day, or even the process of following your dreams and the persistence it takes to shift old patterns.

Truth is, sometimes it helps to hear someone be honest about this stuff. Not so that you can indulge in self-pity about how hard you have it. But so that when the bad day strikes, you have some leverage.

So, how do you survive a bad day?

Here's a few things that might help…

WHAT TO REMEMBER:

1 - The voices do not tell the truth.


They're just your old voices coming up to feed. Do not feed them. This is what makes them stay. Even if you're already hooked in, the best way to begin the unhooking is to rest, or to be very kind to you.

2 - This is not who you are.

The voices like to tell you that this depressed person is who you really are and that the rest of the world doesn't have these same flaws. Not true. This is just a temporary set back. That's all.

3 - Mochaccinos don't take the voices away. It just makes them go faster.

Bad Days are not a call to rush out to Starbucks, hoping that if you move faster, it will all go away. If there's any action that needs to be taken now, it's probably a nap.

4 - You don't have to be productive today.

It's okay to put down your goals and to-dos for one day. You can return to them tomorrow. Today, make it your goal to just get through the day being kind to yourself. Think of it as a sick day. Maybe there's no PROOF – like a fever. But your insides are sick. Let them heal.

5 - Everything seems worse when you're tired or hungry.

Eat something yummy. Take a nap. Or go somewhere and sit quietly.

WHAT TO DO:

1 - Stop feeling bad about feeling bad.

If it helps, make today a container. Know that you're allowed to have this stuff and that nothing horrid is going to happen with this one day of getting thrown off.

2 - Make no decisions.

The late Richard Carlson, author and psychologist, gave this great advice: "Never make decisions when you're in a low mood." His belief was that low moods are a natural occurrence and that any low-mood decisions are typically not healthy. Put off all decisions when you're having a bad day.

3 - Don't read fashion magazines. Or the news.

4 - Take a 20 minute walk.

Bring a gentle affirmation along with you. On days like this you don't want to say, "I am master of the universe!!!" On days like this you want to say, "I am loved. I am safe."

5 - Don't try to fix yourself today.

No need to rush to the Self-Help section at Borders. Maybe steps you can take toward being healthier in the big picture, but not today. Today, let yourself stop.

6 - Lower your standards.

If you get out of bed, or eat a good healthy meal, be proud. Tomorrow you can have your old high standards back and be productive and evolved and all that. Not today.

7 - Say NO to anything if it's motivated by the word "should."

This is a good rule to follow on good days too!

8 - Ask yourself what you feel like doing.

Sometimes the answer to this can be surprising. Maybe you'll want to begin a fiction audiobook and clean your closet! Maybe you'll just want a nap.

9 - Don't do anything destructive.

Don't overdose on sugar or indulge in alcohol. Don't call anyone who drains you. It will not make this better.

WHAT TO BE:

Be very, very kind to yourself.


Be the way you would be with someone who is sad or hurting or scared. Because today, you are.

WHAT TO KNOW:

That the victory is not about not having bad days anymore. The victory is that you can get back up after having one.



Performer, songwriter, and creativity consultant Christine Kane publishes her 'LiveCreative' weekly ezine with more than 4,000 subscribers. If you want to be the artist of your life and create authentic and lasting success, you can sign up for a FRE*E subscription to LiveCreative at www.christinekane.com.

Thanks for the read! Take a tour of the green home - see where you can make your home safer too. www.debthinksgreen.com
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